Auditions for
Saint Mark United Methodist Church
Production of

by George S. Kaufman and Moss Hart

Directed by Amy Holloway

at Saint Mark United Methodist Church

Tuesday, September 4, 6:30 PM and Thursday, September 6, 6:30 PM

Callbacks Sunday, September 9, 2:00 PM

Performance Dates:  October 27, 28 (Preview), November 2, 3, 4 and November 8, 9, 10, 2012.

Set in the 1930’s, famously outlandish radio wit Sheridan Whiteside is invited to dine at the home of a small-town Ohio factory owner and his family. However, before Whiteside enters the house, he slips on a patch of ice outside the front door and injures his hip. Whiteside is forced to remain at the home indefinitely, and in the process of recovering alternately terrorizes the family and household staff, meddles in the love-life of his long-suffering assistant, Maggie, and endears himself to the rest of the community.

9 Women, various ages playing 20s and older
26 Men, various ages playing 20s and older


Maggie Cutler – Sheridan Whiteside’s private secretary and chief interference runner for the past ten years. Stage Age:  30 – 40’s.

Lorraine Sheldon – Young, beautiful, temperamental, acid-tongued, self-serving actress.  Referencing Gertrude Lawrence. Stage Age:  20s – 30s.

Mrs. Stanley (Daisy) – Highly strung wife to Mr. Stanley. Stage Age:  40’s – 50’s.

June Stanley – Daughter.  Hopelessly in love with Sandy. Stage Age: 18- 20’s.

Harriet Stanley – Elderly, eccentric, live-in sister to the elder Stanley, with a sinister past.  Referencing axe murderess Lizzie Borden. Stage Age:  50+

Miss Preen – a spinsterish nurse who attends to Whiteside.  Deadpan sense of humor. Stage Age:  Open

Sarah – John’s wife, the talented household cook. Stage Age:  30s – 50s.

Miss Dexter – Star-struck neighbor. Stage Age:  Open.

Mrs. McCutcheon – Star-struck neighbor. Stage Age:  Open

Men (some roles may be doubled)

Sheridan Whiteside – A middle-aged, obnoxious celebrity. Referencing Alexander Woollcott.  Stage Age:  40’s – 60’s.

Bert Jefferson – Young, attractive newspaperman.  Maggie’s love interest. Stage Age: 30 – 40s.

Mr. Ernest W. Stanley – Frustrated and discomfited host to the demanding invalid. Stage Age: 40’s – 60’s.

Richard Stanley – Son, talented amateur photographer. Stage Age:  20’s.

Beverly Carlton – Flamboyant English Entertainer.  Referencing Noel Coward. Stage Age:  30s –40s.

John – The Stanley’s Butler.  Efficient and star-struck by Whiteside. Stage Age:  30s – 50s.

Dr. Bradley – Whiteside’s doctor. Stage Age:  40s – 60s.

Professor Metz – An Einstein-looking entomologist friend of Whiteside.  Referencing Dr. Gustav Eckstein of Cincinnati. Studies cockroaches instead of canaries. Stage Age:  40s – 60s.

Banjo:  Referencing Harpo Marx. Stage Age: 30s – 50s.

Three Convicts – Michaelson (Butcher Shop murders), Henderson (Hatchet fiend), One unnamed. Stage Age:  30s-50s.

Mr. Baker – Prison Guard. Stage Age:  30s – 50s.

Expressman (2) – Deliverymen who deliver a crate of penguins. Stage Age:  Open.

Sandy – Union organizing boyfriend of June Stanley.  Keen –looking, neatly but simply dressed.  Stage Age: 20s – 30s.

Westcott – A named radio technician. Stage Age:  Open.

Radio Technicians (2) – Radio technicians. Stage Age:  Open.

Choir (6) – Six choir members who sing silent night for the radio broadcast.

Deputies (2) – Two large burly sheriff deputies. Stage Age:  Open.

Plainclothes Man – A stalwart looking man with an air of authority. Stage Age: Open.


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